Incomplete Limericks V4

[Pooka]

Lux said:

There was a young woman from Heaven
Who ordered a taxi for seven

'A Streetcar...' with wings
They're desirous to sing
Falsetto, to the grand works of Previn

[Captain Nudnick]

Philip Larkin, who wrote 'Mr Bleaney',
Was frequently liverish and spleeny
So he'd take up his pen...

[Benbow]

Philip Larkin, who wrote 'Mr Bleaney',
Was frequently liverish and spleeny
So he'd take up his pen,
Which he did, now and then,
And slag off mum and dad (not like Heaney!)

[Crusoe]

Pinter said “Blair, f*** your wars”,
And followed it up with a pause,

[Benbow]

Pinter said “Blair, f*** your wars”,
And followed it up with a pause.
Pinter's pauses, he says,
Are the heart of his plays.
Just as well, for the words are all Balls.*



* That refers, of course, to Zoe Ball, the Disc Jockette, who I believe to be the secret author of most of Pinters work. Honestly. Ps: there should of course have been an apostrophe in Balls

[Crusoe]

benbow said:

there should of course have been an apostrophe in Balls

Well I can assure you there are no apostrophes in mine!

Hmm, must have a word with Tiger Lil about this, I believe she’s the local representative of the campaign for real apostrophes.

[Benbow]

I'd become a member of the Campaign for Real Apostrophes, but I worry what the acronym might be.

Ted Hughes turned his back upon prose,
To write verse about foxes and crows,

[Captain Nudnick]

Ted Hughes turned his back upon prose,
To write verse about foxes and crows,
Then a classical ode
On the natterjack toad...

[Pooka]

Ted Hughes turned his back upon prose,
To write verse about foxes and crows,
Then a classical ode
On the natterjack toad...

Made him grow a big wart on his nose.

[Captain Nudnick]

Nice one, Pooka! Much mirth here...!

A boy ballet-dancer from Crewe
To his partner said, 'Ooh, look at you!'...

[Lux Interior]

A boy ballet-dancer from Crewe
To his partner said, 'Ooh, look at you!
Your divine fifth position!
Darling, you're a magician!"

[Captain Nudnick]

A boy ballet-dancer from Crewe
To his partner said, 'Ooh, look at you!
Your divine fifth position!
Darling, you're a magician!"
It's a pity your face has gone blue

[Pooka]

The mistress of ol' Dr. Seuss
Was always a little bit "loose" . . .

[Pooka]

puka said:

The mistress of ol' Dr. Seuss
Was always a little bit "loose"

She beckoned Thing 2
While Thing 1 remained true;
She somehow put both to good use.

[Benbow]

Young Pooka loves Seuss- fancy that!
She feeds green eggs and ham to her cat...